Dreamin’

Falling in the dark with angels by my side
The worst things I’ve done wink in pale red
Rainbow of chocolate flows under my feet
Shades of emptiness, but flowers of hope
I’m dreaming myself, but not the mirror’s look

Skinny Angora jumping around the stars
Freedom of the sky, I feel it in my smile
Mushrooms, white powder and acid too
I’m losing my thoughts, they run so fast

Baby’s laughing, I’m crying with pure tears
My sun is hiding. Go freak out that moon!
I’m wearing glasses, bigger heart on my face
Don’t wake up tonight- my promise
Never wake up- your funny threat
Good night! … wait, heaven?

Reclame

Daddy

Do me a favor, I’ll catch you under my spell
Delight my tastes with a cherry ice cream
I want more and more from you, please offer
Between us is a heavenly affection, daddy

Dance with my body on a poetic rythm
Increase my sensuality by winking at me
Be deeply connected, discover my desire
Listen to my lullaby while I’m fancying you

For a night, I’ll be your Lolita with the attitude
For a life, I’ll be the best dream or fantasy
Keep our secret safe, we have total intimacy
I’ll never be yours, daddy, but I’m still with you

Rape

Can’t get rid of that memory
Your weight on top of my tiny body
Slowly breathe, I tried to stop it
I was ashamed to scream at you
Saying „no, please, I’m not in the mood”
My words were in vain

„What he will think about me?
What’s he gonna say to his friends?
That I’m a little girl and not worthy?
Should I really try to stop him?
How bad can it get? Still blocked”

You left me there
So miserable, so gross
A tear ran from my eye
Years after I promised that
I’ll never stay quiet again.
Girl, you shouldn’t too

To be young

Beautiful skin with no wrinkles
Eyes shaded only by makeup
Indecisiveness before taking action
Energy from sun felt in the bones
Happiness by getting drunk
Party hard by the sea in the midnight
Dancing and smoking and laughing

Dreams for future and no ideas
Making plans with your best friends
Depression is the evolution stage
Highschool or college in the morning
Underpaid jobs in the summertime
Sleeping in the car with an open window

Making love in random places
No protection and no one cares
Inspired by movies with rough moves
Playing songs in the background
Pleasure in the muscles, in the veins
No shame in laying down all naked

Swimming in the pool, the summer
Running into the woods, the autumn
Drinking hot tea and coffee, the winter
Pictures with flowers in the hair, the spring

The power of teen years is priceless
Hippie style in another century
Rain could be so romantic
A smile represents our spirit
Feel everything and learn anything

Lonely

I never felt so lonely in my life
Now tasting the sorrow of tears
Bitterness of the poisoned words
They keep screaming non-senses
I cry when I give them a color in my heart
Blacker than a black hole
My mind is played by evil streams
In the shadow of the dark sun
I’m destroyed, I’m in their cage

Live alone, die alone
Illusions seem to be reality
Sickness of a soul
Pain is a way of living
Wasting my skill of surviving
I’m going down, falling from the sky

Insane. Madness. Creepy.
They terrify me with their thoughts
Under my bed is safer than outside the room
Drugs save my mind
I can’t hate, I’m just afraid

Always a child inside
Writing my death with seashells
Asking the stars if they want to help

Catch the idea, save me.

Depression

Nothing really happened
I opened my eyes in the midnight
Started to cry and realised
I had it.

I’m feeling sick and weak
I’m not ready yet to face the life
And I won’t let them to see the truth
My lies keep me perfectly fine
I wonder how long will it take
I will die soon or they will see how crazy I am?

„Why are you so sad?
So melancolic and antisocial?
You don’t like us?
What is your problem?
Why don’t you speak?
You’re so mysterious and weird.”

Laying down and cry all night
Going to the bathroom and hide my tears
Cough before a phone call
Forge a smile and put glasses on my red eyes

„We sorry for how we treated you
It wasn’t ok it happened to you
You deserve better than this
Did you ever try a psychologist?
You should get some help”

A maniac stage and a normal one
Knock on my mind’s door
And make my situation worse
Because I’m wearing a mask
But after a while, the depression says „hi”

64

Sixty four, my sweet outdoor
Perfection without a direction
Infinity from multiplying divinity
Nameless, but shameless
Strong enough and never wrong
Smooth like a pray for ruth

Connection by natural selection
Love brought by a white dove
A cure for wellness and no lure
Universe answer, unfair curse
Deep circle in a powerful purple
Inspire from the sky, I need a fire
Artsy world for a mental disorder

Desire for a dream with blank theme
Have a chance or do a dance
Soul awakening and moon coloring
Rainbow above all makes them glow
Insecurity in the obscurity
Heartbreaking moments with the poets

Be aware of who you are
On the edge we meet ourselves
Nobody deserves ignorance
Cities are burning from infirmity
In warm hands we should trust
Unity keeps us healthier and stronger

Sirens and violins before funeral
Ivy tattoo and a rocker in the tree
Xanax pills to awake in the dream
Teen spirit and the hippie style
Yawn before a long damaged trip

Films and popcorn in cinema
Only kids allowed to watch it
Useless brains without creativity
Rusty people inside the box

Anne discovered the biggest secret

Lots of rules and no mercy
Imitating equality and respect
That’s how we lie to each other
Thanks to ignorance and fright
Limits keep us in an open box
Encourging us to never look up

Grey sky and dark eyes
Images of truth fly away
Ring finger with a diamond
Lonely time spent in the couple
Suicidal dreams before sweet sleep

Pumpkin taste on my thoughts
Orange vibe in my emotions
Effy is still quite and depressed
Timeless moments of suffering
River’s music into the woods
You are the water of my life

Season of horror stories, friday the 13th
Money and a coin in my deck
Whistle in the night for my demons
Special death and Bill is smiling
Groupie love under the moonlight

Born to be the other woman
Sensuality and deeper connection
Men’s attention on the blonde girl
Bloody attitude and whisper after heaven
Cherry infinity on my lipstick
Moans in the hotel rooms, on the beach
Goddess in the pool forever

I’m 64, I’m the one.

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A photo of Tina Aumont.